Made from wrinkly tin from ‘47 to ‘81, the H van should really be a MotorPunk favourite. It has DS running gear and 2CV headlamps. If it were an animal it would be a French Bulldog made out of wet cardboard by primary school children. Slow, rusty and ugly and particularly popular in the ‘70s we really should be enthusing about this Citroën. But we’re not. And you can blame the hipsters.

No city street, park or outdoor event is free from these things now. They serve organic, fair-trade, ethical coffee from a counter in tiny cups for silly prices. Can we get a soya foam babychino with a sprinkle of nut-free hazelnut, please. My life-partner will have the same. £22? Can I use Applepay? Sorry, my fur baby just pissed up your van.

I love the look of the H van. I’d like one to transport old bikes and smuggle booze and stuff. But while we should celebrate vans being used as vans these particular vans are a fookin’ honeypot to hipsters. And that’s not my cup of tea.

PS – what the bloody hell is a “Churros” anyway? All I want is a 50p cup of tepid tea and an ‘obnob.

About The Author

Rich Duisberg

Rich's drivel regularly appears in Practical Performance Car and GT Porsche magazines. He has also written for Classic & Sportscar, MogMag, Classic Performance and Retro, Banzai, Evo, and Modern Mini. He also did a book no-one bought. His hungover fizzog also often appears on CBS’s Carfection channel enthusing about historic motoring. Le Mans winner Derek Bell once refused to get in Rich's Morgan Three Wheeler with him at the wheel. Currently amongst the detritus in his garage is a 1972 Fiat 500 Abarth, a fat BMW and a Lotus Elise. Previous machinery includes a Porsche 968, an Alfa GTV V6 and a dreadful Sinclair C5. He also owns a vintage Royal Enfield pushbike.

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